Sucking


I suck.

And what I mean by that is that I take a lot in and don't put much out. Right? That's what sucking is.

Part of what starting this blog was meant to be was me putting back into the world my meshed up way of fitting together all the pieces that I have sucked up and moved around to my interpretation and then spit them back out here to make sense of it all.

And hopefully have some people start reading it, and if I'm super lucky make some moolah from it, and if it's really blessed, hopefully engage some people in conversation, and if it's truly a God thing, then see lives changed because of their encounters here.

BUUUUT, I have only written two blogs. Well, this is my third.
I'm tired of sucking. I'm ready to produce. I WANT to put something out.

Reasons why I haven't been blogging and have continued to just take in:
1. Life is busy.
2. I feel like EVERYONE and their super cute snapchat filtered dog is blogging. I've never been one to want to do what everyone else is doing. In fact, when I see a trend coming, I tend to go another way...Shiplap? As soon as it started appearing in every home on Fixer Upper I knew it's demise was near....
3.Why would anyone want to read my thoughts? Why do they matter? Do you know how many blogs are out there?
4. Fear - fear of being too vulnerable, fear of alienating, fear of being cliche, fear of being just like everyone else, fear of repeating myself in 20 different ways - I hate it when bloggers do that.:)
5. A little rebellion.

"Rebellion?" you say.

Yes.

Our pastor is preaching on Making Room. Not just in our church, but also in our lives for what God wants to do. I have heard Him (God, not the pastor) talking to me about writing for some time. But I have always doubted myself. So when I think of making room in my day to sit and type and think, I can come up with lots of things to fill that space. But, I can't let it go. I can't drop it. I try to push it away, rebell, but it always is there.

So today, here I am again, picking up the ball and moving on down the field. I don't know if I'm gonna score anything or not. Maybe His call is just to get the discipline. Just to follow through and to learn why that's good for me. No money made, no readers reached, no life but my own changed.
Here I am, Lord. Today, I am here.

Dare for the Day: Come back tomorrow. And you? If you're reading - whatever it was today that you didn't want to, or were afraid of doing, or didn't have time for.....will you do it tomorrow?

Peace and blessings.
G.

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